Very often I am viewed as a stern parent, that does not allow her children to be exposed to much. This is very amuzing to me because we do expose our children, but at the same time we do apply scripture and our values to the things that we allow. If our children question the choices and boundaries that we set forth, we will then talk further as to why they are drawn to it and what makes it good or bad according to godliness, not the word standards of what's ok, acceptable or popular.
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8
If we are to think and guide our children to think on such things that are excellent and praiseworthy, why would I allow my children to watch tv or movies that are not, listen to music that is not to the glory of God, go places that are not or even hang out with people that are not.
This may sound a little crazy but children tend to think and act out things that they see on tv or movies, so therefor we do not allow them to view things that we may have issues with them reacting, saying or using in play. If our Spazzy gal who is 9 stays the night at a friend's or even grandma's and something is on the tv that does not line up with what she has been taught, she will and has called us to ask permission or even asked to do something else while they watched or even asked them to turn it off. It has been a shock, joy and blessing because we never instructed her to do this, she just stands firm on our values. Such a JOY!
The music is the same way, so much music is violent, sexually driven or just about sinning and making a joke about it, saying it's ok or that's just who I am. YUCK! I, myself as an adult, do not even care to listen to that, it's just all too usless and a waste of time. Our family as a whole really only listens to Christian music, any kind, we like classics, hymns, rock, alternative, pop and country. There is just as many choices all across Christian music just like secular music. When our children are at a friend's they usually tell the friend or the parent I am not allowed to listen to this. Love it! I desire for my children to understand and obey our boundaries no matter where they are or who they are with. If there is too much of an issue I may choose to only allow the friend over instead of allowing my child to constantly feel uncomfortable.
If our children are constantly mislead or hurt by a certain friend, there will be a boundary placed there with that friend. At this time my children are still learning and growing, so they can only be so strong and I am aware of that, therefor I am very involved in thier frindships and choices of whom to pal around with. We desire to be present in all choices as long as they live in our home and are our children. We have an open door policy, meaning 'talk to us' about anything and everything, there will not be judgement or descipline, but theit will be encouragement. Through sharing now, we pray that they will continue to share and come to us as adults, after they leave home.
Those that we love and hang around do make an influence on our lives but likewise I am aware and I do allow my children to be the light to others as long a they are not be negatively influenced. Also, we stand firm on making our children be best friends because they will have each other longer than any friend, (knowledge from experience). So, if they are fighting and not able to play together that is automatic no friend until we see improvement.
Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.” 1 Corinthians 15:33
We know that our children are blessings from the Lord and we honor Him by rasing our children in the way that He instructs and revels to us through His Word-the BIBLE. We do not allow the world or other people to make choices for us, I will listen to others but the moment what they are saying does not aline with scripture, it all becomes useless. He is my Father and I must obey Him and not cater to my childrens whims, the world or others. We do mess up from time to time or get too lax but if they are aware or notice, we sit them down and talk to them about it, apologize, repent and pray together.
“If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. Matthew 18:6
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:4
Ok, so now that I've gone through all of that, there is a main and popular verse that everyone knows but we base everything on this verse...
Train up a child in the way he should go;
even when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6
This is what we desire, for our children to never depart from what we have tought them, from God, from the Bible, but if they do we desire to give them godliness to turn back to.
What do we hope they will return to as rebeling teens or even experienced adults?
We desire for them to turn back to godly principles, morals and boundaries, return to GOD! We pray daily that they never turn away or rebel, but we know that it is a possiblity, therefor we know it is our responsiblity to give them a good foundation to stand firm on in GOD or return to once they've rebeled.
We are so blessed and thankful beyond measure for our children, the least we can do is raise them in the way that He says and instructs.
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